Hi!!!
I'm Peyton.
Welcome back to...
"Peyton's SLJ!"
today I'm going to pretend that I was Mr Mandela,I would have to write a diary entry.
Dear Diary,
today was just the same as all the other days.
Wake up in a dump,have 1 year old raw toast for breakfast,get attacked and almost die,sty in gross cell for the day and sleep on a bed make of straw
(VERY UNCOMFORTABLE).
Well any way that's pretty much it.
Sincerely Mandela.
Thank you.
BYE!!!
By Peyton.K
Hi Peyton
ReplyDeleteI love the vocabulary you used its amazing it makes the story pop out a lot and it makes it way more interesting to read. I also love the ending it so mature.
Next time you could add a picture of Mandela and write who she is because I'm a bit confused I probably have done this activity before but I don't remember at the moment.
Keep up the good work
By Mehakpreet
Hi Peyton,
ReplyDeleteI'll try and follow the criteria - positive, thoughtful and helpful blog comment. Before that though I hope you are having a wonderful holiday.
I got a really good picture of how you were feeling today - like any other day. It took me back to a time when I slept in a bed that was very uncomfortable. It was pretty descriptive, however did you think about drawing the ideas out to add some more detail?
ReplyDeleteKia Ora Peyton,
Well done for writing a diary entry for Nelson Mandela. Although I don’t think his life in prison was as bad or scary as you have made it out to be. But I know it wouldn’t have been great either, I know most prisons make prisoners stay in cell for most of the day. I think I would get very bored being stuck in a cell all day. I enjoy being able to stand up and go for a walk whenever I like. Do you like going for walks? One of my favourite places to go walking on the beach because I get to look out at the sea plus people walk their dogs at the beach so I get to meet lots of dogs!
Blog ya later!
Dani